You know what?

Fuck you.

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So I ditched the elimination diet. I was getting terrible stomach aches and my milk supply was suffering. Well, I didn’t ditch, I modified.  I’m cutting out the top 8 allergens and severely limiting my intake of corn.

So far? Nothing. 

She’s had good days and bad days all mixed in together and I can’t find a pattern.  I’m wondering if it even has anything to do with what I eat.

She still doesn’t really poop on her own. **sigh**

If you can’t tell, we’re in the middle of a bad stretch. 

Thank God that Skittles are gluten free.

So, you probably couldn’t tell from the blog thus far, but I am not a stay at home mom.  I never have been and probably never will be. The last 11 weeks have been maternity leave.   Going back to work is just one big whole mess of emotions.  On a personal level, I’m about to shit my pants with excitement. I love my job, I love my boss, and I love giving 40 hours a week to my company.  It’s awesome.  But as a mom, I just feel like shit.

I come from a very traditional family…now that I think of it, I’m actually the first working mom (well, ok, my mom did when she had my sister at 17, but sister stayed with Grandma) in my family.  I think my family treats it as a, “well if you have too…” whereas, I’m happy to do it and feel like it gives me balance. But when your kid is colicky, just wants to be on the boob all day, you feel like a real jerk going back.

My oldest LOVES his nanny. Like, he asked for her when I was on leave. This woman is a saint and we all love her.  I know Cora will too, but I know it’ll be a hard transition for her.  To date, the longest I’ve been away from her has been about 5 hours. You know, it’ll probably be a harder transition for me.  I’ll miss them.

But, when my friends call, the ones without kids and with real jobs, it’ll be nice to have something to talk about other than reflux and MSPI.  I need this. I need to get out of the bubble.

So,  wish me luck, and my husband too, who will have to get ready in the morning, while praying to god she sleeps.

 

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Details to follow.

So last night I went for my first run in about a year. I think this sums it up:

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I love running and I’ve been doing it off and on since I was 16 but I never get into a real routine, so I always run like a novice. But let me tell you the first post partum run (I’m still post partum right? 11 weeks out? Please, I need that the justify the lack of weight loss) it’s extra special

1) I’m breastfeeding

All of my sports bras were bought not only before breastfeeding, but before kids in general, so I have to “sport” two bras that are toooo small in order to get some support. The ensuing cleavage was indecent. Even my husband, a boob man, thought it was funny.

2) I didn’t run my entire pregnancy

I do not do well with pregnancy. I have vicious morning sickness the whole time. Don’t worry, I still managed to gain 35 lbs. But between that and the fact that I am prone to bleeding because of my bicornuate uterus, I pretty much just put my body into hibernation.

3) Cora loves to rock.

When Sam was a newborn one of the best ways to calm him down was to stuff him in a baby carrier and walk and walk and walk. Not so with Cora. She hates (!) the Moby and the Snugli and would rather rock. So, for the last 11 weeks, my ass has been parked in a rocker.

4)This is my 2nd baby in less than 3 years

My abs are shot. My core is dead and the core is a huge part of running.

Suffice it to say the first run was tough. I squeezed myself into my workout clothes, got my two fitness apps and Pandora’s “Come on Eileen” station going and started off. It was the weirdest and most unpleasant feeling at first. All that area of my body that used to be muscle jiggled and bounced every time my foot hit the ground. It took me a bit just to find my rhythm and then posture. Even my diaphragm seemed to have atrophied. But after adjusting to my new body  it felt awesome.

I have a habit of pushing too hard on my first time out and sabotaging myself by either hurting myself or just turning running into hell, so this time I have a program. I’m way behind on this trend but I downloaded the Couch to 5k program. I was hesitant because I already feel like a fat ass and a program with “couch” in the title confirms that. But. I’m glad I got it. It gives a nice framework from which to start and still let’s you feel like a runner while pacing you. Essentially it’s one minute on, one off. I can go at whatever speed I want during the intervals. I really pushed on the running intervals and slowed on the walking while still keeping my heart rate up.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m still slow as all get out with a 13 minute mile and I’m embarrassingly sore. Unlike my unstructured runs however, I can’t wait to get back out. My goal is to run one of Disney’s half-marathons by October.

I think the best part was having my own time. Cora freaks out on anything without boobs, so Matthew hasn’t been able to help much but we both decided I needed this. It makes me a better mom, better wife, and as I’m returning to work in less than a week, hopefully a better boss.

If you’re looking to start running, I highly recommend the Couch to 5k. It’s a great training to. And hey, I’d you get started, maybe we can have some friendly competition 😉

Day 1 was a pretty good failure. Why, you ask? Well, let’s review what I’m allowed to eat vs what’s in my house:

Allowable foods:

Zucchini

Squash

Turkey (no preservatives)

Rice

Potatoes

What I had in my house:

Rice

Frozen french fries

Jelly Beans

And for the first half of the day, the 2nd list was all that I ate.  For the record, I’m making jelly beans part of the elimination diet. They don’t even have soy lecithin.  If we still have issues, I’ll reevaluate.

The fries, while potatoes, aren’t even nearly elimination diet friendly. I was just running with a loop hole.  My husband ran out and got me some ground turkey, and the veggies so I could eat a respectable meal.

It.Was.Delicious.

I wish I had take a picture for y’all, but really, it was a meal I’d eat on a regular day.

I made turkey patties seasoned with salt and pepper and cooked in olive oil. Pretty good, but a little dry.  The real winner was the zucchini.

I’m not a zucchini fan. I eat it because it’s good for you.  I think the texture is weird and it gets nasty mushy when you saute it. usually I just cut it into chips or spears.  This time I decided to make really thin strips with the potato peeler.   Then. I salted and peppered the zucchini. Heated up some olive oil, and sauteed it until it was soft. Cooked the turkey burgers, threw the zucchini back in the pan on high heat to crisp it just a touch.

Maybe I’m just behind, but I had no idea that this vegetable was so amazing.  It tasted buttery, and felt like I was eating a noodle. Maybe it was the starvation talking, but I was in heaven.

This morning, I made this:

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What? I’m not a food blogger, I have an iPhone.

I know, it looks like snot in a bowl, but it was AWESOME.

I’m a sucker for sauces, especially creamy ones and I have mourned their loss since I cut out dairy.  I figured for this elimination diet, I was really going to have to think outside of the box. So I decided I was going to make a zucchini/yellow squash sauce.

I sliced one of each veggie and cooked about 1/3rd of it the same way I did last night. I threw it and about 1/4th a cup of olive oil in my Bullet and wham bam, thank you ma’am, deliciousness. It’s creamy with a hint of sweetness.

I poured it over rice and browned turkey for an awesome breakfast (and lunch).

I will concede, the sauce is a bit “minerally”. These veggies are kind of minerally themselves, and the EVOO only cuts it so much.  If I could eat things, I’d probably throw in some garlic and onion.  I’d say maybe carrot, but then, that sauce would look like straight up poop.

So, lessons learned:

1) allow yourself a cheat and remove it if it looks like it’s bothering your child still.  Like any diet, it’s really hard to stick to something that’s just too stringent. Granted, i say that because my kid is largely manageable.  If your kid is losing weight and pooping blood etc, you may want to bite the bullet

2) don’t start a diet if you don’t have the foods you need. I felt sick all day and the fries had things like cornstarch and soybean oil in them so it really defeated the purpose

3) go into it when that knowledge that yes, you’ll have a very very limited diet, but use that as fodder to try new things with old (and minimal) ingredients.  The stuff I made was stuff I’d eat either way and it’s also very healthy. Who knew?

Talk to me in a week and see if I’m still so chipper though 🙂

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That’s one of the first images you get when you google “elimination.” It’s fitting though. Cora and I have had it with the rough nights and we’re committed to breastfeeding. Not to mention, even though I work, I am way to poor for Nutramigen. I also keep hoping that breastfeeding weightloss is going to kick in…

But I’m going on an elimination diet. It won’t be as strict as the Dr.Sears diet. If anyone tries to take my one cup of coffee a day I will CUT YOU. Ok, not really but coffee is important. I’ll also keep my Earth Balance spread. Beyond that? Rice, potato, Zuchini, squash, and turkey. My wonderful husband is making turkey patties tonight.

This is all precipitated by the fact that I caught a bug from my husband. It took him about 2 days to kick it and it’s taking me much longer I think because of the lack of sleep. Cora actually doesn’t seem too miserable, just super gassy. She also doesn’t poop without help and I really don’t want to put her on Mira.lax. (my husband picked this up for me. He was MORTIFIED. I asked him to get the off brand because it was so much cheeper. He came home with the Mira.lax brand. I asked why and he got this flustered look, “I dunno! Everyone was in that aisle and they all wanted laxative and they were all old! I couldn’t just push them around!”)

So here’s where we are. I’m putting on the blog so that I will stick to it.

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